“I’m done. I’m just done, Liz. I’m done with the attitudes. I’m done with the personality clashes, the rudeness, and the resulting lack of cooperation and communication. I’m done with the selfishness and the lack of empathy for anyone else. We’ve got so much to do, and I’m just done with trying to get my team to act like adults, be professional, and respect one another so we can work well together.”
Leaders are tired. They’re really tired – physically, emotionally, and psychologically.
Though not verbatim, I’ve heard this same idea at least a dozen times in the past three months. Leaders are tired. They’re really tired: physically, emotionally, and psychologically. The past several years have been a non-stop slog of trying to produce products or provide services in constantly changing environments, while societal and political tensions have escalated further heightening personality and belief differences. For many, they have left their pressurized leadership roles for an earlier-than-expected retirement, or a new position with less or no responsibility for others. But for those who have stayed, they’re looking for relief and for their teams to act like a team instead of individual fiefdoms with walls that are only getting stronger.
Leaders are looking for relief and for their teams to act like a team instead of individual fiefdoms with walls that are only getting stronger.
So, do I have a magic pill to help them change their teams’ attitudes and behaviors? No, but I have been sharing an insight that’s been resonating. Regardless of what they believe about society, politics, or other aspects of life, while working, every team member is being paid to perform specific functions and collaborate with others to ensure the customers can be served. That’s pretty straight forward right? Now, keep this in mind: They’re being paid their full salary to perform their function 100% to ensure the customers are served.
They’re being paid their full salary to perform their function 100% to ensure the customers are served.
Also, if your company has company values (or as I call them, The House Rules), every employee is by default bound to abide by them – as long as they’re taking a paycheck from your company. In order to get paid, they have to do their job and abide by the House Rules. Again, that’s pretty straightforward. But here’s where the challenge has come into play for many team members and leaders – and understandably so. Many of us leaders have been telling our teams they have to be respectful of one another. Either as a ‘common courtesy’ or because that behavior expectation is a part of our company values. However, as I’ve heard from some of my clients, it’s REALLY hard to respect someone whose politics is diametrically opposed to yours, or who is cheating on their spouse, or who needs constant validation, or who regularly demeans others. I get it. Believe me I understand. So let’s make it easier and a bit more clear when respecting someone is tough. Instead of telling your team they need to be respectful of one another, simply say be courteous to one another.
Instead of saying be respectful of one another, simply say be courteous to one another.
This slight wording adjustment changes emotions and behaviors. Being courteous doesn’t require you to respect a person, but it does require you to be a professional and do your job 100% (i.e., communicate with them, collaborate with them, support them in supporting the customers, etc). Every client I’ve shared this insight with has grabbed onto it. Give it a try with your team. It may just help you and them when being respectful is just too hard.
Copyright MMXXVI – Liz Weber, CMC, CSP – Weber Business Services, LLC – www.WBSLLC.com +1.717.597.8890
Liz Weber is an advisor to boards of directors, business owners, and C-Suite leaders. She’s a leadership, strategic and succession planning consultant, keynote speaker, and author. Learn more on LinkedIn.
